Response to Anonymous

If you’ve read some of my papers about the FiveStar Method, you’d know that my focus in working with your dreams is primarily on the dreamer, not the imagery, at least at first.  So what I notice about this dreamer is that you are getting through these challenges without having to do much on your own. I mean, you aren’t flying the plane--you’re simply standing in the cockpit, where the controls are. You don’t panic, nor do you try to do something to avert the crash--you simply pass through the event unscathed. It’s a little different in the second part, because when you find yourself in another threatening spot, you do something (doggie paddle) on your own to respond to the situation. But again, you’re rescued from the situation by some force other than yourself.

When we focus on the dreamer’s responses, we can’t assign a “good” or “not so good” assessment without the dreamer, because we all have different chronic ways of responding to life. If you tend to be rather passive, and depend on others, it comes through this dream, and it might not be the “cutting edge” of your development. But if you tend to be a controlling person, then this dream shows another side of life, whereby you are calm and taken care of--perhaps a very different kind of experience than you’re used to. So I would need to ask you, “What represents a creative and new (for you) way of responding to life? Going with the flow? If so, this dream shows you trusting a great deal. But if you are already calm and tend to be passive, you might look upon the dreamer’s level of response as reflective of a style that might need to be challenged (by you).

Regardless of the level of the dreamer’s response to these challenges, it certainly seems to work out, suggesting that you are getting through things with lots of support, either from within yourself and/or from other people in your life.

After analyzing your responses, we would turn to the imagery and get your associations. The old man, your cousin, the Euphrates, etc. In the case of the two male figures, they don’t do much directly--there’s no verbal communication. The lack of interaction is intriguing,and I’d want to explore that with you. But at least we can see that Christopher’s presence seems to coincide with your rescue, again conveying the sense that you’re being watched over and cared for by strong and capable support.

When we factor in your friend’s dream, as a possible psychic connection, it’s tempting to  insert him into the helper role for you, isn’t it? You don’t dream of each other, but the situations are similar, and he is the rescuer in his dream. Interestingly, he experiences rescuing one of his children, and you are as helpless as a child, only able to doggie paddle. In a way, it’s a wonderful overlap, suggested psychic support from him. But again, you would need to ask, “Is this my customary role, and will depending on him unbalance our friendship?” It could be a refreshing and bonding experience for both of you or it can be “chronic” and unbalanced. It takes both of you participating in this analysis to answer these questions. I certainly cannot, but this process, which focuses on relational dynamics raises the questions that need to be asked, don’t you think?

If you'd like to share more reflections on your dream, please do so. I might have more to say at that point. Thanks for sharing your dream!

Comments

Anonymous said…
Thank you. I found that this dream and then the dream of my friend kept resurfacing in my mind over the last few weeks. I was purely focused on the imagery and neglected to inward first in my attempt to analyze the dream.
I am 1 1/2 years out of suffering from years of depression with severe periods of isolation and alienation. I tended to live my life in a passive aggressive manner, controlling those who I allowed to be a part of my life and the situations around me through drama and manipulation. My life was based on a long list of mistrusts and abandonment, first starting with my Father and subsequently, played out in my romantic relationships with men.
I have gone through a deep healing and self acceptance process and in last 12 months for the first time in my life I have genuine friends. These are women who have helped me through this period of trying to understand the depths of the things I hidden in my soul, which were fears, insecurities, pain that played out in my life.
I have taken care of myself most of my life and always found myself being my biggest cheerleader, provider, comforter, even in the midst of well meaning love relationships with men.
I had learn early on, that the men in my life who love me, don't take care of me, or protect me or they leave...so while I have relationship with them and desire a level of intimacy, I had always found it difficult. Actually, I would be present, but quite empty in my relationships.
Fast forward, 2 years and I am beginning to trust and open up, again and believe that I am capable of having a loving, healthy and supportive relationship with men. I am even contemplating moving with my Father, to get to know him and find a sense of closeness and bonding.
My Father, is quite empty in his emotions. Perhaps, it is guilt and shame, that eats at him, but I know he loves me, but finds it difficult to express it to me. So, in turn he comes off empty and often times mean. For the most part, these were the type of men I have chosen.
I did some research on the name Christopher, which means "bearer of Christ", "Christ within". I have really started to excercise this level of peace in my Higher Power. Knowing that I don't have the burden to have to make everything "right", that I could just, as you wrote, "go with the flow". Could this be the rivers, presence.
I have been blessed beyond measure this year. I am calmer, more confident, beginning to trust more and more acceptant of me and all that comes with me.
Anonymous said…
Now, for my friend's dream. I have known him for 23 years and he had his dream, just 3 days before we were set to meet for the 1st time in 23 years. We have maintained such a beautiful friendship for on the phone for exactly 12 months. I have known and felt this unbelievable psychic connection with him and all these dreams I have been having in the month of December confirm it. I do wonder if opening up my heart for something more, would unbalance or even distance our friendship. He's the first and only man that I have maintained a plutonic relationship with. Would moving into something more romantic, cause him to leave? Will I revert back to my periods of distrust and ultimately self-sabotage my relationship? I have asked all these questions. But, I feel such a sense of safety, truth, support, love and adoration from him. Something I have never experienced. The irony, he has elements of my Father and his Father is just like my Father. However, we both talk about our lives, the impact on how our experiences have affected our past and we are determine to be present in the co-creation of our future by being aware of character defects and riding on past hurts and experiences.

I would hope he would be interested in analyzing our dreams together, not sure if he would be opened to it. Our chemistry is unbelievable, we finish each other’s sentences, we often overlap words at the same time, we can talk about a subject together and it happens. We definitely have the ability to co-create.

I recently had a dream that I had a daughter, maybe about 2 years old sitting on my lap and she was waving and saying, "hi daddy, hi daddy", she was laughing and almost jumped out of my laugh. When I looked up to see, who she was talking to, it was my friend, across the room, cooing with her, holding out his arms for her.

I want to delve more into my dream and at some point all the dreams which have happened in the last 6 weeks, 4 all together, with 1 last night.

I am one to have always said, I don't dream. But, the fact that I having so many dreams so frequently, is interesting to me.

Thank you, Dr. Scott.